Monday, May 5, 2008
Neither New nor Kids...Discuss
Oh. My. Gawd.
I just heard the new NKOTB song "Summertime" on the radio this afternoon, and I am so underwhelmed I almost have nothing to say.
I will admit, I expected/hoped their new stuff would be deliciously bad on the order of Britney (expected) or even the soundtrack to Grease 2 (hoped). But it's bland in a way that even Miley Cyrus cannot match. And there's something especially ookie about listening to a bunch of guys approaching 40 singing a song that includes a lyric about getting a girl's number and being warned not to call after 10.
According to The Toronto Star here's what they've been up to in the hiatus:
"Since disbanding in 1994, members Jordan Knight, Joey McIntyre and Danny Wood each released solo albums [Danny released a solo album?] while Donnie Wahlberg turned to acting [but acting turned him away] and Jonathan Knight became a real estate developer [and was so successful at it he went back to boy-banding?]."
Truth be told, I admit to having a wall plastered with their pinups...in 1989...when I was 13. Jonathan was my favorite. Later, I found out that he and Tiffany dated for a while (the original Britney and Justin?) which made Tiffany a little better and Jon a little worse in my eyes. But I got into and over all of it in the span of about 3 months (in time for my 14th birthday). How's that for quintessential boy-band fandom? I will also say that Jonathan continues to be my favorite if only because he's the only one who appears to have been gainfully employed in the last 15 years.
So...back to the title of this post. They aren't new and they aren't kids. Which makes them Old Men on the Block. And where I come from (a land of heavy Law & Order viewing), those are called pedophiles (see aforementioned lyric).
Okay, maybe not that far, but at least creepy and sad
...like Bret Michaels.