The Guts to Be Civil

Facebook Status Update, November 4, 12:10pm
Kristina is thinking about her friends in CA...hoping for a resounding NO on 8.

Jason wrote at 2:48pm
Krissy, I saw you post on my facebook page about prop 8 and I saw one of your friends state that people who are for prop 8 are ignorant. It is concerning to me to see this kind of stuff. Marriage is (I am sorry to say it) a christian institution and has always been defined by the wast majority of the church as a union between a man and a woman. All... Read More religious traditions like muslims, buddhists, Jews, etc. have always understood it this way. Marriage is a theological concept not a political one. If one is going to play the "equality for all" card in marriage, this will lead down a very slippery slope. What I mean is, if marriage can be redefined a two concenting adults, it is not a huge leap that it could be defined as three concenting adults or four and this will open the door to polygamists. Hey, if it is truly equality for all then why can't an adult and a child marry or a human and an animal. One must discriminate at some point, where do we draw that line?

Kristina wrote November 4 at 5:14pm
Jason,
Thanks for taking the time to write – I know your faith is important to you and it is unfortunate that our political passions sometimes lead us to name-calling. It is clear that neither of us will change the other’s mind about Prop 8, but I do want to take the time to respond to some of the points you made in your post.

The heart of your argument seems to be based on marriage being a Christian institution and that it is a theological concept, not a political one (though you go on to cite a series of non-Christian faiths, including Buddhism which considers marriage to be a secular issue). I would be willing to accept this except for the fact that in California (and the rest of the nation), marriage has _legal_ status – which makes it a political issue. The original DOMA was declared unconstitutional for good reason – it did not provide equal protection under the law. Simply changing the constitution to make an exception to afford this legal status to certain segments of the population and not others solely based on gender does not solve the equal protection problem.

As for the slippery slope (the one you say will lead to polygamy and child marriages)…first of all, polygamy/multiple marriage is illegal (despite its presumption of heterosexuality), so the numbers game is not on the table. Changing the sexes of those involved is not affected by the intent of this law.

Second, one legal aspect of marriage is its treatment as a contract under the law. Contracts are based on free choice and legally, children lack the capacity to contract without parent/guardian consent. The legal marrying age in all states is 18, 16 with parental consent (in most states), and New Hampshire allows marriage at 14 with both parental and judicial consent. Gender does not affect one’s mental capacity to enter into contracts.

Long story short: the web of laws defining what “counts” as marriage as we know it (two adults, presumably in some sort of romantic relationship) will not unravel simply by allowing those two adults to be of the same sex.
That being said, I venture to assume that the reason you object is because your faith does not condone homosexuality and the arguments you put forth come from that deep-seated belief. While I may disagree, I respect your right to believe what you want. But I’d like to remind you that it was only 41 years ago that the Supreme Court struck down anti-miscegenation laws that would not have allowed you to marry your wife, or my father to marry my mother because bride and groom are of different races. My parents are still happily married, and by the looks of your facebook pics, your family is also going strong. Can you imagine being legally deprived of that?

Anyway, I am certain you will not agree with me or change your mind, but I wanted to engage in the conversation with the same level of civility and care you afforded me. I hope I succeeded in addressing your comments with respect, if nothing else.

Krissy

Jason wrote November 4 at 6:29pm
Krissy,
Thanks for the reply. I do see name calling on both sides as unfortunate and especially the infamous catch-all "ignorant" word. People use it for just about anybody that they disagree with these days. You are right, I am approaching this from a religious perspective as since I am a Pastor, I see things from that vantage point. Also, if gay marriage is allowed, it would not be the end of the world. On my personal moral importance grade from 1 to 10 with 10 being the most important, it is about a two. I do not think gay marriage is an outrage, it is just kinda silly. I see it like I would see atheists who demand the "right" to be baptised. Why would they want to be? Baptism is a ritual that is between a person and their commitment to God and Jesus Christ. If you do not believe that God even exists, what is the point? I guess if some atheists wanted to baptize each other as some commitment to atheism, I would not object. But it would still be strange. There are homosexuals who take such a view on marriage. They do not want to be married because they understand the implications of what that ritual means.
Although, I do see what you are saying about the civil side of it and if gay couples are denied any civil rights that hetero couple have I would be the first to want equality in that sphere.
Anyway, I could go on but I gotta go and probably should stop. I hope all is well with you. Keep in touch.

One Gutsy Post

It's not mine, but it's oh so good. Check it out: Size-Adventurer

Labor Day

This is it.

Win or lose. Official finisher or DNF. I will not be broken.

Track my progress here. I am Athlete #813.

Something More Important Than Courage

Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of my life.

My Heroes Have Always Been Gutsy Gals

Mary Lou
1984 was my first Olympics and Mary Lou was my first sports hero. It's just that simple.




Nadia
After the '84 Olympics, there was a made-for-TV movie about Nadia that I watched with my parents that introduced me to her. Watching this again with adult eyes, I am more in awe of her than before.




Lynnette Woodard -- The first female Globetrotter (Go to 2:06)
She became the first female Globetrotter when I was in 5th grade and made me want to play basketball, which I did until 7th grade and it became painfully clear that (a) I would be 5"1' forever and (b) soccer was my real love.




Mia Hamm
I think I've mentioned before that anemia spelled the end of sports for me in ninth grade. I have often wondered how my path would have been different if I had been able to continue in sports and/or grew up during Mia Hamm's reign. I don't get weepy over it, though. In place of sports, I veered off into the performing arts. I'm happy with that path, too, but I will always be grateful for the strong foundation sports gave me.

No Free Passes Between Gutsy Broads

Yes, this is LOOONG overdue. No excuses besides simply not being in a writing mood. *shrugs* What can I say? It's been a whirlwind month.

In Part Two of the Multi-Sport Athlete Exchange Program (Part One: Dam-to-Dam), Danielle came out to the east side of Iowa and joined me for the Lake Geode Challenge.

It should be obvious by now that recounting the minutiae of race day kinda bores me, and during this race I decided on a truncated form for race reports. HOWEVER, this particular day wound up being one of those turning-point kinds of races, so I actually have something to say about this one.

It was my first tri of the season (I couldn't get to the QC tri for the flood) and the first day back from strep. I was going to treat it like a long training day (I was only looking to finish somewhere close to my average paces without being too miserable and/or collapsing).

And then late on Mile 5 of the 10K run, I entered the race.

The Lake Geode run course is mercilessly hilly. I unapologetically walked all the hills -- until the approach to the Mile 6 sign. Here, I heard the footsteps of the two women approaching. I said to myself, "No free passes," and started to run again. They eventually passed me, but I kept them within reach.

I re-passed them as we approached the finish chute. And then, inexplicably, this gutsy broad re-re-passed in a dead sprint, and of course I gave chase! In the end, I ran out of pavement and lost 2nd place in our age group by one foot.

The irony is that she and I were easily 8th and 9th from last in this race overall. I had no illusions about where we were in the pack, and figured placing/hardware was out of the question. But, dammit, neither one of us was going to let the other get a "free pass" especially not that close to the finish line. And even though I "lost," I am so grateful to that woman -- that gutsy broad -- who made me dig deep and enter that race, if even for the last moments, because she lit a fire in me that I had almost forgotten about. We high-fived on the other side of the line as I gave her heartfelt congratulations. Forget Inner Ass-Kicker, she helped me rediscover my own Inner Gutsy Broad -- who is way tougher, hands down.

When I got home I watched this clip a few times, reveling in my renewed competitive, yet appreciative spirit and shed a few tears of recognition at the final voiceover:



To be clear, I don't put myself on the same level as these elite athletes, but stripped down to the least common denominator, their moment was our moment writ large. For me, this drive is part of what makes me an athlete. Yes, triathlon is sometimes about going the distance, other times about the competition, but at its best about digging deeper after you thought you had nothing left.

So thank you, Stephanie May of Somewhere in Iowa for making me dig deep that day and energizing my inner athlete. But thanks especially for helping me re-discover my Inner Gutsy Broad, who admires yours...and is hot on your heels! :D